La Capra

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Posts by La Capra

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  13

  Ive faded too successfully !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  by vitty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  we moved nearly 2 years ago, quite a way from our old hall, and only attended our new hall for 6 months before we started to fade.

  so we have never had a elders visit and we didnt have time to make friends, so our fade has been very successful here.. the only problem is, my family dont know we dont go anymore, which is a problem when they visit, cos we have to get around the "are we going to the meeting when we visit?

  " we have managed to get around it one way or another .

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  La Capra

  I think you may be able to string this along indefinitely. When your people visit, special events get planned. On meeting nights or Sunday, get tickets to a game or a play, go to natural attraction, plan a special meal-either at home or a nice restaurant. After all-how much time do you have to spend together catching up on life these days.

  When most JWs vacation, they don't go to the meetings (unless they are vacationing with JWs that are not related). If these folks were suspicious, or if they were dead set on going to meetings, they would have called ahead to the Kingdom Hall in your area, thus finding out you have faded. That they have not done this thus far is telling. Either they don't care, or they don't want to know. Either way, you are in a don't ask don't tell sort of relationship with these guys.

  Sounds like a good thing, until some event forces the issue, just enjoy.

  Shoshana
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  67

  What did shunning do to you?

  by hillary_step in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there can be little doubt that the wts 'shunning' policy is a dangerous weapon.

  each year tens of thousands of people are disfellowshipped, and experience the reality of being shunned.

  many of them still believing the wts doctrine that if they die in this condition they will shortly be executed by god at har-meggedon and die an eternal and disgraceful death some leaving the faith altogether.

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  La Capra

  
  This may sound cavalier, but before I DAed, I was banking on the shunning. I was so sick of everyone in my business (my very boring business, by the way), that I was looking forward to being let alone.

  My mom doesn't shun me (I just went to see her yesterday, for the sole purpose of having lunch with her and my dad. I made it, she ate it, at the table with me, we talked about law school). I knew my mom would not shun, before I DAed.

  About five years ago, a JW started to talk to me at the gym. It annoyed me. I was friendly and polite, but she was one of the reasons I wanted to be shunned. I fired them for a reason.

  Shoshana
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  30

  what the hell is up with witness girls???

  by tsunami_rid3r in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  haha, are they desperate for sex or a relationship?

  because if it is like that, hell i see something here.

  today, when i was out in field service, this chick kept playing with my hair all day, then at the restaurant she was feeling up all over me.

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  La Capra

  You will have to invite her to visit you at your dorm in the fall. Show her around campus. "Expose" her to everything she is missing in the cult... Always use a condom. Be prepared for her to rat you out, which will embarrass and piss of your parents, but will seal your fate with the JWs.

  You gotta feel sorry for the other guy-it sounds like he was trying too hard. (Now, Tsu, do you see what that looks like and the effect it has on girls?)

  You are doing a great job of being 18. Carry on.

  Shoshana
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  14

  Ex JW success stories

  by greendawn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the wts likes to claim that there is no real life outside the borg and those leaving it, that is leaving jehovah, to re enter -gasp- satan's world are unlikely to find any satisfaction or success in life.

  yet many ex jws have done much better after leaving the borg in terms of family life, social life, job wise, financially, and educationally, spiritually, and overall adjusted to a much more natural and fulfilling life style.

  do you know of such ex jw success stories personal and/or those of others?

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  La Capra

  I DA'ed at 19 and immediately started college full-time, graduated cum laude and went straight to Ed. school to become a high school math teacher, which I have been doing for about 15 years. On a teacher's salary, I bought two houses (I rent one out and live in the other). Right now I am finishing my last year of law school, and will continue to teach until I get bar results (November 2006).

  I have deep friendships with some really incredible people, and am in a position to really help people (I do criminal defense work for the indigent). I have a fulfilling, supportive, loving and meaningful spiritual/religious community. I am able to give my free time and my financial support to causes that are genuinely worthy.

  These are all things I would not have been able to do had I stayed in the cult. The inner conflict would have been too much to bear. I shudder to think what my life would be like had I not taken control of and responsibility for my life early enough to avoid some major mistakes (marrying the wrong guy, having kids with him, living a lie...) that would have greatly hindered my education, self-actualization and emotional and financial health.

  I did not turn into an alcoholic or drug addict, I wasn't forced to support myself as an exotic dancer, or worse, a call girl. I didn't wind up in jail, homeless, or beaten and abused by some jerk of a boyfriend. My home and possessions (even the religious paraphernalia) are not demonized (too bad-that could be fun!).

  Although it was not ever a goal of mine to be a millionaire, it looks like I will get there by my 40th birthday. Not bad for someone who was never even going to have to go to kindergarten....(er, I mean junior high, oops nope, not that, high school, oops, nope, wrong again, college....)

  Shoshana (of the class who never didn't plan to go to college)
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  9

  dammit life in confusion

  by tsunami_rid3r in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm confused, i feel hypocritical.

  first let me get this clear, i'm not a religious person, but i believe someone or something started the big bang and chain of events that created our universe.

  i believe in evolution.

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  La Capra

  I think that going out in service in order to hang out with a member of the opposite sex (as just a friend, or otherwise) is probably one of the better reasons to go that I have heard (or used - when I was your age. Must say I never tried to feel up the guys at the coffee shop, tho.' ) Carry on. Shoshana
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  19

  Other religious viewpoints about paradise

  by TheListener in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  one thing i haven't been able to successfully find or understand is how other major religions feel about the end of the system or the final judgement from god.. i've seen the left behind series.

  do protestants in general feel that there will be a literal earth with people on it?.

  do catholics believe that human spirits will be united with their physical bodies after the final judgement?.

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  La Capra

  Some branches of Judaism teach (that is not saying the practitioners believe it) of resurrection and a "paradise." There are fascinating parallels between ancient Judaism around the time of Jesus and WBTS teachings and practices, actually. (My personal opinion is that the WBTS is a Jewish apologist, apocalyptic cult, based on its early doctrines).

  Shoshana
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  72

  35 Yrs ago today - We rocked!

  by Amazing1914 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  does this sound like the jw organization you know today?

  yes, on july 17th, 1970, my wife and i were baptized as jws at the "men of good will" district assembly (convention today), at the oakland, california coliseum - where the raiders play.

  nearly 70,000 attended, and over 750 were baptized ... and it all made the news in the san francisco chronicle & examiner and other newspapers and radio stations.

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  La Capra

  Jim,

  I was 2 and a half, and 99% likely at your baptismal assembly. I don't remember that assembly at all. Then the following one at Kezar Stadium I do remember. My hand got slammed in a very heavy door, and I had a badly injured finger for quite some time after that. I do remember being at Kezar in 71. Yeah-really early mornings and really late nights. I don't remember much, but I vividly remember that the lights at night made anything blue look purple.

  Shoshana
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  37

  Putting an offer on a home........(law ?)

  by love11 in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  to make a long story short- last saturday, we put an offer down on a house.

  then sunday and mon.

  we did some research on mortgages and decided that we could get a better rate of interest if we waited till next spring to buy a home.

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  La Capra

  And good old standard contract law says that there is no contract (therefore no duty on either party) until the valid offer is accepted.

  And guess what, you can rescind the offer if want, then it is no longer valid. IT IS AN OFFER, NOT A CONTRACT!

  However, it would appear that you have notice of their rejection of your offer, as evidenced by their "sold" advertising, which means you can conduct yourselves accordingly.

  Until both sign parties sign a purchase agreement contract, neither side is bound by an offer. Usually, an offer in real estate begets a counter offer (which really is a rejection of the first offer and a new offer to you, which you may now accept or reject.)

  A verbal offer in a real estate deal is only as valid as both sides want it to be. A purchase agreement contract for real estate absolutely must be in writing, or it is unenforceable.

  Don't stress, if your offer was low, then at worst you will get a counteroffer which you are free to reject.

  And besides, there are tons of contingencies in the purchase agreement contract through which one could wriggle with a buyer's agent, but again, you have not signed a purchase agreement, so chill.

  Shoshana (who did well in both her Contracts class and her Real Properties class, but has put the information out of her mind as she concentrates on her last year in law school. And please do not consider the above information legal advice on what you should do. It isn't legal advice.)

  P.S. If this really was the house for you, then you would be feeling stressed that they aren't going to accept your offer. That the revese is true is telling about the timing and this particular house. When it is the right time and the right house, you will go the extra mile to get it done.
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  7

  Excited about DC

  by gringojj in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my wife is planning to go to the assembly this year.

  shes still not sure about the whole jw thing, so from what i have read this dc should be helpful.

  when she does go to meetings she just comes home and tells me all the crap they said that didnt make sense.

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  La Capra

  I'm wondeirng if the Bethel Boys were sitting around in their plush, leather and mahogony club, in their overstuffed chairs, sipping 30 year old single malt scotch bemoaning how their minyons are no longer minyoning for them.

  Then one of them strikes on the idea to make this convention about obedience. "Since they won't obey us, we will order them to obey us at next summer's convention..."

  The irony: if they aren't obeying, what makes the Bethel Boys think that ordering them to obey will get them to obey?

  At least in the US, this religion is now largely a mass of people who are insincere JWs, trying to do what they want while staying on just this side of the law. Now if everyone would jsut come clean, those who want to leave would still have plenty of family and friends in their lives...

  Oh well.

  Shoshana
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  27

  im stuck on guitar

  by tsunami_rid3r in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  im trying to learn stairway to heaven but its too hard, what should i do?

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  La Capra

  Are you learning it by ear, or from a chart?